We're just not getting the moisture.

For a few years now, Montana has been in a drought. Blame it on global warming. Blame it on the lack of rain dancers. It don't matter. There isn't enough water falling on Montana. It's Christmas and there's only a skif of snow on the ground.

Merry Summer 2007 Fire Season.

It's GREEK

I dropped the Japanese class. It's too Unamerican for me. There are 20 different ways to say the same sentence all depending on if a guy is telling it to his dog, his son, his daughter, his wife, his father-in-law, his ex-wife, his boss, the emperor, his dead mother, or his drinking buddy.

There's been a parting of the ways with my Japanese gal. The language barrier was too thick for both of us.

Sickos with Pets

I saw a man hitting his dog with a plastic wiffle bat today. I thought about calling the police. I don't know if it's against the law but it ought to be. If he does that in public can't think what he does in private. His son, I am assuming it was his son was there crying the whole time for his father to stop.

Maybe I should mind my own business. It's his dog. If a man hates an animal so much why does he keep him?

University of Montana

I never finished highschool. I got my GED and then when I was in the service I got an Associate in Applied Science in Hydraulics.

I met a sweet little Japanese gal in Missoula who speaks not so much English and I think I might take a Japanese course at the university. I get a real bargain for tuition for being retired military. It's 5 credits because the classes are every day of the week. But I think it might be interesting. The counselor says I will learn how to read Japanese hieroglyphics. Imagine that? Reading and writing Japanese? My father will roll over in his grave.

Bring 'em Home, Brian.

Frenchtown, USA

Frenchtown is a small town situated west of Missoula, Montana. It says there are more men here than women but everywhere I look there are women. Large FAT single (you aren't surprised) women.

I got me a real nice place here. 15 acres with a creek cutting through the top left corner of the place. 4 outbuildings all in great condition. The house has 4 bedrooms but only one bathroom. I'm sacrificing one bedroom to add two more bathrooms. The single bath here now will be a 1/2 bath and the door will face into the back porch which I'm turning into a mudroom.

I got me an Indian lady coming in twice a week to clean house. She makes the best fry bread and she's not fat. I could marry a woman who cooks this good. But she has 3 sons and I am not ready to pay for that! Good boys though. Indians raise respectful children I give them that.

Time for a new J.O.B.

It is official. I am retired after 26 years in the Air Force. What to do what to DO?

I met a woman a hundred years ago who used to read tea leaves. These were ugly wet things left clinging to the side of her cup once her tea was drunk up.

She told me my dog would die and he did. She told me I would get a promotion and a medal and I did. She told me my wife would leave me for another man and she did after she found out I was sleeping with a woman who read tea leaves.