Why God Made Beer

Classic Spooner

Find your own pose!

Never Never Never

If you don't have any kids with her, never give the EXwife your phone number.

Oh it's only for emergencies Jack.

So what in her schizoid mind is an emergency?

I've had too much to drink Jack. I miss you in bed Jack. Can you drive 3 hours to Great Falls and fuck me Jack? No strings attached Jack.

Sure thing honey because nothing gets me hornier than a mascara-smeared, slack faced 40-something who can't hold her liquor. Drunk on a woman stops being cute at 20.

Changing the phone number and Blackfoot charges for that. I should bill the bitch.

It's GREEK

I dropped the Japanese class. It's too Unamerican for me. There are 20 different ways to say the same sentence all depending on if a guy is telling it to his dog, his son, his daughter, his wife, his father-in-law, his ex-wife, his boss, the emperor, his dead mother, or his drinking buddy.

There's been a parting of the ways with my Japanese gal. The language barrier was too thick for both of us.

University of Montana

I never finished highschool. I got my GED and then when I was in the service I got an Associate in Applied Science in Hydraulics.

I met a sweet little Japanese gal in Missoula who speaks not so much English and I think I might take a Japanese course at the university. I get a real bargain for tuition for being retired military. It's 5 credits because the classes are every day of the week. But I think it might be interesting. The counselor says I will learn how to read Japanese hieroglyphics. Imagine that? Reading and writing Japanese? My father will roll over in his grave.